Feb 15, 2010

The Fat Tulips. Starfish.

The Fat Tulips—shambling, fey, overamped twee—released one album and a basketful of singles during their brief, incredibly obscure tenure on the indie circuit.

From their very silly website:

The young and ripe Mr. D. wrote and produced his own indie music fanzine, titled "Two Pint Takehome" - a reference to his slightly alcoholic tendencies and also because "Two Pint" was the nickname of his inflatable sheep. He sold the fanzine at indie shows along with the flimsy flexi he'd made with Sarah.
Around this time he met the basic line up of the new, nubile Fat Tulips. First came Matt Johnson, a lanky floppy haired goth type, with a pig van, a Shop Assistants fetish and an attitude. Johno had just finished serious rehab for a monumental football habit (he was up to 50 matches a year!) and in order to keep him on the straight and narrow, he agreed to join Mark D.'s ("D" for diabolical) new venture to conquer the Universe of Pop!

Also at that time Mark encountered a hugely talented, Scottish, pop diva with big honkers and an IQ of 545. Her name was ‘Sheggi’ and she was renowned for making young boys cry. At least in her own mind. "Now all we need to make our music" Mark said delightedly, "Is someone with no memory who wants to play bass". That was easy. Matt and Sheggi knew of a local Nottingham boy named Paulie who had a memory deficiency and eleven cats. They knew instantly he was the one.

The line up was completed when they asked an innocent catholic school girl named Katie Keen, who'd been raised by wolves, to sing their songs, but she was so freaked out by the debauchery of the other band members, she left soon after recording the now splendiferously famous, "Where's Clare Grogan Now?" single. Legend has it the real reason Katie left the group was her inability to accept Mark's relationship with 'Two Pint' the sheep. The band told everyone she'd met an untimely end in a 'plane crash and blonde, uprightly challenged Sheggi dragged her guitar to the front of the stage to take over the singing. Thus the Fat Tulips we all know and love to blisters was born.....

Songwriter Mark D was also in Confetti.


Fat Tulips official site

1 Blurt:

Anonymous said...

unfortunately, sheggi met the same end as the two pint take home sheep.